Dear Spots,

I’m not sure if it has escaped your attention but I am no longer an adolescent girl.

I am now a much more mature *ahem* lady.

I cannot understand why you are so fond of my face!

You are actually like me more now than when I was a teenager going through that awkward greasy stage. Back then I didn’t take half as much care as my facial skin as I do now!

Now I take care of my face.

I mean, I use Clarins now for gods sake! The good stuff! No longer whatever teenage fad soap that I had been coaxed into buying by fresh faced, splashing water around their faces rather than on, girls in the adverts!

And I exfoliate regularly! EX-FO-LI-ATE! Admittedly this is a fairly new phenomena but still!

Yet there you are popping your ugly heads up all over the place!

Without a bloody care for what I’m up too and usually when I’m due to go on a much needed night out!

Yes I know that I shouldn’t pick you and I should leave you alone and that you would leave sooner but I just can’t help it!

And yes, I am well aware that by messing with you I am making matters much worse! When you’re about the temptation is always there!

Sometimes I think you’re going, you sneaky little pimple bastards, then your bigger, redder more prominent friend arrives overnight without a bloody hint it was going to visit!

Can you not give a girl a break?

I seriously have enough to deal with, without you hanging around constantly!

The plumpness, that I have no willpower to fix, the extra large hair roots that nearly give me the ombre look (if it wasn’t for the grey, I swear I’d almost get away with it!) and the heavy bags under my eyes are enough to contend with surely!

Please spots, please. I’m not sure what else I can do to make you leave.

So if you’d kindly take it upon yourself to not pop up in the first place that would be grand!

You’d make this 32 year old, very happy indeed!