Thoughts and More

With our heavy hearts

My heart is heavy

Part of it now broken for those I’ve never met

We are left with questions that can’t be answered

Left wondering what the world is coming to

What the world will look like when our children are grown

Cowardly souls with mission to steal innocence, freedom and lives

Murderers whose only intention is to incite hatred and fear

To divide.

The unimaginable happened.

In the city I love.

Now my heart hurts for those I have never met

Whose faces are now ingrained on my brain.

Darkness fell

For mere moments

Until light began to shine

The police, paramedics, doctors, nurses, firemen, call handlers, faced with a nightmare but did not give up.

Put thoughts of their own families, their own lives on hold

People rushed to help, not thinking of themselves but others

They calmed people, helped them leave, tried to keep people safe

Held and comforted those who were injured

Ensuring they were not alone

Not for applause or recognition

Because that’s what we do

People offered their homes for shelter

People offered lifts to strangers

Taxis and restaurants and businesses thought not of profit but of people in need

People queued to give their blood

They sent food and drink

They gave up their time

They donated money in the small hope it would help

They went out and got bees tattooed on their bodies

Because they needed to do something

They came out in their thousands and showed the world

We were united

That we would not let the darkness win

I do not have the energy, the time, to allow hatred to take a place in my heart

My heart is heavy

It is heavy because I choose to love

I choose to love, to remember those poor souls no longer here

I choose to think of their families, their friends

I choose to hold them in my heart because I cannot imagine what they are going through

Because they now face a lifetime of grief, because their lives will always now be less bright

I choose to hold in my heart those that survived, who will live with this always

I choose to remember all those that helped in any way that they did

I choose to look at the outpouring of love, of support, of disbelief that’s been shown over the last 2 days.

That is where the light lives

There are a number of fucktards who through their actions are intent on making us believe the whole world is bad

Who want us to live in suspicion and fear

Who cause atrocious things to happen and make us question humanity, leaving parts of our hearts broken

They are broken, they are heavy because they are open to those we do not even know

Yesterday after school my daughter played out with her friends

I watched as she rode her bike, laughing as her hair whipped behind her

Last night I hugged them a little harder, for a little longer

Thinking of those that I have never met

I do not want them to grow up in fear of living

I want them to look, to understand the world is not a bad place

Even when it seems like it is

In the darkest of moments the light still shines

We showed that light can win

And with our disbelief, our grief, our heavy hearts

We showed that love will win.

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